STUCK IN NEUTRAL & SPINNING MY WHEELS

I'm obviously doing something wrong because my weight isn't budging! Patience, I keep telling myself over and over but I'm slowly beginning to lose all patience with myself and my healthy living goals. Chad and I talked about it a little tonight. I need to push myself more....I tend to be "ok" with average effort but to achieve the most weight loss I need maximum effort. I know deep down inside I have more to give so I need to draw on that strength and use it. I wish I had time to speak with him longer tonight because I would've told him how defeated I feel about going up North to see my family and college friends and not achieving the goals I had set for myself and this trip. I wanted him to know how ugly and overweight I feel and I am scared to see my family and friends again. But my trip is 10 days away....I can choose to have a pity-party for myself or I can do something positive with these 10 days and do the absolute best I can with the time I have left. So I'll choose the latter and step it up. At least I'll know deep down that I gave it the best I could at the very end......